Anna Nicole Autopsy Results

"How do you spell my name again?"


It turns out that Anna Nicole Smith accidentally killed herself. Talk about whoopsy (pushing up) daisies!

The doctors found an abscess on her ass, that she was taking antibiotics for, which might have been caused by growth hormone needle injections. Anna was probably hoping that the steroids would make her brain grow bigger.

The following are the substances found in Smith's polluted body:


Shouldn't there be trace amounts of TrimSpa in there somewhere?

Instead of burying Smith, a charitable pharmaceutical company should have harvested the chemicals within her to make much needed medicines for developing countries. Sometimes recycling can be a good thing.

Anna Nicole Smith: Suicide Blonde?

"Shh! I hear a herd of buffalo approaching..."

According to Dannilyn Smith's former nanny, Quethlie Alexis, she claimed that Anna Nicole Smith had tried to commit suicide on two separate occasions.

The first attempt was by downing an entire bottle of sleeping aid. Kool-Aid laced with Strychnine? Your guess is as good as mine.

The second try at suicide came by way of attempting to drown herself in her own swimming pool.

The silly woman forgot that her immense breast implants possessed floating properties greater than that of a lifejacket.

Live and learn.