Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Ernie's Fountain of Youth

I've seen reruns of the helicopter television show, Air Wolf. Only now do I know what Ernest Borgnine's character, navigator Dominic Santini, really meant when he told Air Wolf's pilot, "We're almost there, Stringfellow."


Monday, August 18, 2008


"Let's see who has the better O-face."

I guess I, and the entire theater audience I saw Pineapple Express with, wasn't high enough to love this movie. Over 17,000 voters on rated this flick an "8", so I figured it would be actually worth paying to see. It would seem that there are nearly twenty thousand stoners with accounts, who had the presence of mind to over rate Pineapple Express.

There were three laughs, tops, throughout the entire viewing. And I'll list them, so I can save potential consumers of this film their hard earned cash.

Red: "I used this gun when I was a prostitute."
A couple of Chinese translations into English.

Anything else that might have been remotely humorous was already shown to death in their trailers.

Pineapple Express wasn't a terrible movie, nor was it a good one. I rate it as so-so, or as the French like to say, " C'est comme ci, comme ca.
Ah huh-huh-huh!" I suggest that you download it or get severely intoxicated and rent it if you have access to your grandma's senior discount.


Roseanne Barr = Angry Cunt

Roseanne continues to lower the bar when it comes to rational opinions. She rants on her blog that she's angry with Angelina Jolie because she won't openly endorse Barack Obama. The bitch goes on to say:

"Brad & Angie make $40 million a year in "violent psychopathic movies," donate a small fraction to charity "to look as if they give a crap about humanity" and then churn more films that "wreck the earth even more."

Angelina does a lot for the suffering in this world. In 2006, Ms. Jolie and Brad Pitt donated over $8 million to multiple charities.
That's undoubtedly a whole lot more than Roseanne Barr has ever accomplished. Angelina also covers her own expenses when traveling to various refugee camps and will share accommodations and work detail with UNHCR staff.

Roseanne Barr felt it was vital for the world that she spend many thousands of dollars on herself for vaginal reconstruction surgery. Like her vibrator actually cares what dilapidated state her saggy, wrinkly, smelly cooter is currently in.

"Thanks to Dr. Schnatch, I'm nearly as tight as I was on Prom night."

Before Barr talks or types, she should stop taking her various antidepressant medication. That way she might be lucid enough to have something more meaningful to say.