Saturday, January 03, 2009

Celine Dion CAPTIONED!

"Voici Paris Hilton giving fellatio to the Los Angeles Lakers."

"Love can move mountains, but cannot cure my hemorrhoids!"

Celine Dion singing the latter part of the Disney classic, "Beauty and the Beast".

"Dis eez Britney Spears seeting on a washaire machine during da rinse cycle."

"Mon Dieu! I just released a powerful Frenchy fart."

"Check out my imitation of a smelly French woman acting Chinese."

"E-i-e-i-o...and an oink-oink here, and an oink-oink there...!"

Celine Dion auditioning for the role of Despereaux.

After hearing herself sing, Ms. Dion felt compelled to "boo" herself.


Thursday, January 01, 2009

Tara Reid is a Hero!

"Tara, how many cosmetic surgery decisions were you drunk for?"

Everyone should toast Tara Reid, who was unselfish enough to check herself into rehab, so that North Americans would have enough alcohol to drink for all the 2009 New Year's celebrations.

Everyone, raise your glasses to Ms. Reid and repeat after me: "

Tara is all set to reprise her role as Magda in, There's Something About Mary 2.

I'm almost ashamed to admit that I've seen better octogenarian porn than this.