Mock Celebrity Interview

 "Ariel Helwani, the Howard Cosell of MMA reporting and 3-time MMA Journalist of the Year, here interviewing singing sensation Rihanna. I appreciate your time, Rihanna.  My first question to you is why is your current boyfriend renowned female pugilist, Chris Brown?"
 

 

 "It beats me."



 "And your favorite beverage to drink is fruit...?"


"Punch."



"Between you and Chris Brown, who do you think has more hits?"



"I'm sorry. Are we talking about music?"


"Yo, Ariel! I want to announce to the werl that I'm willing to fight female UFC champion, Ronda Rousey."

 
 "Here's the way I see such a fight going down: Ronda would force you to call yourself 'Christy Brown' as she sings the song The Power by Snap, while breaking your arm."  

 
"Shut your mermaid mouth, Ariel, before I kiss your face with my misogynistic fists of fury!"

 
"Chris Brown, you do realize that I'm a guy, right?"
 

"For real? Uh, I suddenly have an audition for a Broadway version of Precious I really need to get to."