Sunday, June 01, 2008

Space Station CAPTIONED

The fan used to guide liquid waste in the zero gravity environment of the international space station's toilet broke down. The following are captions inspired by such a situation:

"Aw CRAP! Piss me off!"

COSMONAUT: “I’m tired of Tang. Anyone up for some lemonade?”

ASTRONAUT: “What brand? Country Style?”

COSMONAUT: “Uhm…’U-Brew’?”

This sounds like a job for...Ass-tro Plumber!

GROUND CONTROL: "You'll have to make like Howard Hughes for a while."

"You can either pass me the Drano or I'm going to, sure as hell, make it rain-o!"

"Who's in the mood for some liquid sunshine -er- I mean, Russian moonshine?"

"Until the toilet is fixed, we all have to wear these ultra absorbent Hubble Huggies."

Instead of being a crude, childish prank, urinating into coffee pots has now become a necessity.

"I'm going outside to drain the lizard...D'OH!"

NASA is currently consulting with Barry Bonds on how to create a makeshift Whizzinator.

It turns out that Lisa Nowak was way ahead of her time.

"Houston, we're all out of Sunny D. All that's left is smelly pee. Do you copy? Over."

The inhabitants of the space station were not amused when ground control chose the song "Chocolate Rain" for their wake up call.



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