Heather Mills Dances with the Stars

Heather Mills is Paul McCartney's one legged ex-wife that took the former Beetle to the cleaners by leaving the marriage with over 200 million of Paul's hard earned dollars.

Now this former fetish model wants to participate in the next Dancing with the Stars tournament on television.

If I was a producer of that show, I'd have a segment where the contestants would have to dance to music they were not priorly made aware of, or they would forfeit their chance on winning the competition. I would then surprise Ms. Mills with having her Turkey Trot to the music of Kanye West's hit song, Gold Digger.

And to make things more interesting, Heather would have to dance to that song with the entire floor covered in discarded banana peels.

The next part would involve Heather Mills waltzing to a live performance of ZZ Top's She's Got Leg.

And finally, Mills would have to execute a River Dance jig without having her prosthetic leg fly off into the audience.

Now that would make for some mighty fine television.