Talking Hawk CAPTIONED!

"A penguin, a Jew, and a cockatoo walk into a bar..."

"Yeah, I had relations with a pigeon. Can't say I'm proud of it."

"My current girlfriend is named Raven. Danm slut always comes home smelling like stale garbage."

"Show me your titties!!!"

"Who here wants to see me hauck a loogie?"

"To answer your question, no, I'm not wearing eye shadow."



"As far as I'm concerned, you guys can all go fuck yourselves!"

"For his upcoming birthday, I'm giving my trainer, Ben, the Bird Flu."

"I spy with my little eye someone that starts with 'B' and is extremely gay."

"I once got it on with an intoxicated swan. True story."

"Back in my college days chicks referred to me as the Fuck Hawk."

"Which chicken shit in the audience just called me an owl? Fess up. Who was it? WHO???"