Thursday, January 24, 2008


Rosie O'Donnell before makeup.

As I've heard others describe this movie, the premise is a cross between the films Godzilla and The Blair Witch Project.

The first thing the ticket counter girl asked me was whether I get motion sickness. At that question, I was wondering if the movie was so god awful that I required a barf bag? She asked because of the amateurish style in which the movie was directed. It's filmed entirely from the perspective of a Manhattanite in his twenties, with a camcorder that NEVER has the image stabilization feature turned on! It was as if Mohammad Ali and Michael J. Fox were taking turns holding the camera.

Like Venom in Spiderman 3, you only get to view the chaos creating sea monster for about 30 seconds in total. The flick is 84 minutes in length. Would it be too much to ask if you got to the star of the movie for more than half a minute? I saw more of the sea creature in the cheap Korean movie The Host than I did in Hollywood's Cloverfield.

I didn't even understand the ending. Did the briny beast die or go back into the ocean? The film fails to elaborate. I guess the ending was made for me to draw my own conclusions. Very well then. The movie isn't worth watching for full price...unless you wish to waste the gift certificate you got for Christmas.



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