Ashlee Simpson Gives Birth

"My crotch won't stop making bubbles."

In honor of the birth of her son, Bronx, Ashlee Simpson is releasing an album called "Lullabies You Can Lip Synch To".

A sad rumor also has it that poor baby Bronx was born without a larynx. But all is not lost, because as soon as Bronx can stand he will be a backup singer for mommy's band.